We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
