I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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