from now on my penis is your penis
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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