You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
