i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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