Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
