Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
So. Much. Porn.
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