ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I party with great urgency now.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
