Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize