CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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