I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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