I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
