I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
