It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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