yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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