Will you blow on my dice?
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
i would punch a child for taco bell
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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