I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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