I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
