For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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