And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
