i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
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