My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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