your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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