I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
