and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
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