The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
