Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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