These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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