Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
