I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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