areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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