In America we eat man semen.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I think my moral compass just broke
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
