So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
