Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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