Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize