just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize