I feel great
I just peed on a car
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
is it fun? or sober?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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