there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
