Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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