I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
