i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Randomize
