that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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