a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
