I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
