please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
