i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He felt like a one man threesome
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
