Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
