the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
