absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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