I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
