I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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