I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
